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Fiction Masterlist

Posted in reverse chronological order, which hopefully means the ones at the top of the list are better. :-) Right now it's all Supernatural. Most of this can also be found on AO3 if you prefer to read it there.

You want to illustrate/translate/podfic/remix/write a sequel or prequel to one of these? Nothing would make me happier. All I ask is that you send me a link when you're done.

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In which I make things happen

Guys, I started writing this post in the spring. The date on this file is March 11. And now I'm annoyed as hell that I didn't go ahead and post it. Because, you know I've said sometimes I put something out into the world and it comes true? Well, here we go again. So just pretend you're reading this in March, back when I came up with the idea.

I was disappointed when I saw the news about Jared Padalecki's new show, because I wanted to believe the guys were leaving Supernatural so they could spend more time with their families. But when I saw it was likely going to be filmed in Austin, I was like, okay, I get it. Work all day, still get to go home to the wife and babies. It's a good thing. (Has anyone official actually said they're filming in Austin? Or is that just fanon?) And I also understand the guys saying they wanted to quit while they were ahead, and let the show go out on a high note. (Some would say they missed that opportunity years ago. Ahem.)

Now, am I going to watch Walker? It's unlikely. I love Sam Winchester, not Jared Padalecki. Jared is a handsome, talented, funny man, but the bottom line is that he's Sam Winchester's meatsuit, and I have a difficult time watching him play anyone else. (Yes, I've seen Friday the 13th. He's obviously playing Sam Winchester, using one of his many aliases.)

(Although, I'll admit, there are some fairly compelling reasons to watch...)

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IN WHICH I AM FULL OF FEELINGS

I didn’t expect Yahoo News to throw a bunch of Supernatural feels at me today. But first they hit me with this: A customer service rep at LAX (airport in Los Angeles, for my international friends) talks about celebrities who are nice and those who are not, and she says

“Jared Padalecki. Yes, he is that hot in person. He was a 12 out of 10, he was so freakin’ polite,” Cindy said. “He actually stopped to talk to me.” OF COURSE HE DID, CINDY.

(You can see the whole Tik Tok here.)

And then the universe said BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE, and gave me THIS. ‘The Boys’ Casts Jensen Ackles as Soldier Boy for Season 3. (This is the Yahoo story that grabbed my attention, but you can read the original version here.)

According to the article, “Soldier Boy is known as ‘the original superhero,’ who fought in World War II and became ‘the first super celebrity, and a mainstay of American culture for decades.’” Oh, in other words, CAPTAIN FUCKING AMERICA.



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In which I have way too much fun with silly little things

Every time these cute little image maker avatar things come up on Tumblr, I have to go make one. I don't know why, but I love them. So when they popped up in my feed the other day, I couldn't help playing.

This is pre-Covid going-to-work me and post-Covid working-from-home me.

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But eventually I got tired of creating different versions of me and thought, who else could I do? Well, who do you think? (Oh, you know me so well.)

This is a weird sad version of the Winchesters as dolls.

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There are so many different styles, from classic anime to simple cartoon. I have a lot of fun scrolling through the different options. And some styles just seem to fit certain characters. This Jack makes me laugh SO HARD.

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Fic: Nothing to win and nothing left to lose

Genre: Gen, hurt Sam, MoC Dean
Length: About 2000 words
Rating: R for language and violence
Characters: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Castiel
Synopsis: Written for the following anonymous prompt in the May 2020 ohsam Sam Winchester Prompt-a-thon: Sam: “Please, Dean… Please, just… Just hit me.” Somewhere, recently, I remarked that I may as well have a separate Hurt!Sam tag for fics where Dean is the one who hurts him. So. Here's another one. This probably isn’t what you had in mind, Nonny, and I kind of hate posting it as a fill for this prompt because it became so Dean-centric. And honestly, even I think it’s a bit much. But here you go. Pure whump without plot, hurt without comfort. Takes place during the end of season 10, when the Mark of Cain is ramping up Dean’s violent tendencies. The title is from “With or Without You” by U2.

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Sam has been standing in Dean’s doorway for five minutes. Dean has been ignoring him for five minutes. He’s aware Sam is there, of course. Hyperaware. The Mark on his arm is like an extra set of eyes and ears, an enhanced version of his consciousness of Sam’s location that normally only kicks in when he’s in full-on hunting mode. But nothing is normal now. The Mark wants to know where Sam is at all times. Dean does not know why the Mark cares so much. He does not question it. He upends the whiskey bottle with a trembling hand, drains the last of it, and does not ask Sam what he wants.

“Talk to me,” Sam finally says. Soft. Tentative. “Tell me what’s going on.”

The thing is, there are things Dean can't tell his brother.

He cannot tell Sam that when he looks at him like that, with the puppy dog eyes full of sympathy and concern and a bit of fear, Dean cannot tell him he has a vivid sense memory of putting his hands on the sides of that face and pressing his thumbs into those sad eyes, pushing until he feels the pop, rendering Sam incapable of giving him that look. He cannot tell him Alastair used to bring him boys who looked like Sam, boys he’d made to look like Sam, and laugh with glee when that was the first thing Dean did to them, every time. No, he cannot tell him that.

What he can say is “Sam, you need to not be here.”

“Where else do I need to be?”

Dean runs one hand down his face. The other clenches into a fist. “Just not here, okay? You don’t know what’s going on.”

“I do, Dean. I know more than you think.” Sam steps closer, still tentative. He’s not quite within Dean’s reach. The Mark is very aware of the distance. “I know that whatever the Mark is doing to you, it builds up. I see the shaking, and the drinking. I know that after a hunt, after you kill something, after you… after you hurt something, you’re better for a while. And I know… I know you shouldn’t be hunting right now. Not the way you are right now.”

Something hot flares up behind Dean’s eyes at that, because hunting is the only thing that helps the way he is right now, and Sam knows that, and here he is saying don’t. The Mark throbs its angry assent.

“So I was thinking,” Sam continues. “If you need to hit something, if that’s what helps. Hit me.”

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Fic: Flies in the Vaseline

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Flies in the Vaseline
Genre:
Gen, preseries
Length: About 1700 words
Rating: PG-13 for language
Characters: Dean Winchester, John Winchester, Sam Winchester
Warnings: Gratuitous use of second person
Synopsis: The best hunters don't smoke. Inspired by a Tumblr post

. . . . . . .

The first time your father caught you smoking, you braced for impact, literally and figuratively. You half expected him to smack the cigarette out of your lips. You definitely expected an angry lecture. But he just looked at you, so calm it was almost scary.

"That's not your first one," he finally said. "How often are you doing that?"

Emboldened, you finished the cigarette in one long, last draw, tossing it onto the asphalt and grinding it out with the tip of your boot. "Not a lot. Not every day. Just… sometimes."

"Mmm hmmm." He was still unnaturally calm. "You think that's a good idea?"

You swallowed a laugh at the possibility that smoking might be what got you in the end, rather than a claw or a fang. "I'm not letting it get out of hand," you said.

"Oh, so you think you've got a handle on it." Ah, there it was. That patented John Winchester attitude, disappointment garnished with a dollop of sarcasm. And it pissed you off.

"Yessir, I think I do. I don't think one cigarette to help me relax every once in a while is going to hurt me." Not any more than the constant infusion of Jack Daniels is hurting you, you wanted to point out, but you were not stupid enough to say that out loud.

He stared at you a little bit longer. Maybe thinking you're old enough to make your own decisions, but more likely thinking you dumbass, I don't even know what to do with you. Finally he said "All right, if you think you've got this situation under control, let's see how that works out for you. But don't let Sam see you doing it. You know how the kid looks up to you."

You replayed every word in your mind, looking for the command. It wasn't there. "So you're not telling me to stop?"

"Would it matter if I did?"

That felt like a trap, and you didn't answer.

He didn't mention it again, and didn't see you smoking again, until a couple of months later. You'd successfully cleaned out a pack of ghouls with some friends of his (no, not friends, associates; John Winchester didn't really make friends), and when Ripley pulled out a Marlboro and then waved his pack at you, you took one. Your father watched and scowled and didn't say a word.

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Fic: But my dreams, they aren't as empty as my conscience seems to be

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But my dreams, they aren't as empty as my conscience seems to be
Genre: Gen, hurt Sam
Length: About 3000 words
Rating: PG-13 for language
Characters: Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester, Charlie Bradbury, Castiel
Synopsis: This takes place immediately after 10.18, "Book of the Damned," where the Styne family attacks the Winchesters and Charlie, and Sam stashes the Book of the Damned instead of burning it. Let's pretend that Sam was more seriously injured in the fight with the Stynes than anyone realized.
Notes: The theme of the 2018 ohsam birthday meme was Hurt vs. Comfort, in which we were invited to respond to a prompt and write either about the hurt, or the comfort. An anonymous poster made this request: "Gen. Dean hugs Sam hard to hold him in place while someone cauterizes the wound in Sam's back." I started to write it, realized I'd gone with stitches instead of cauterizing, got frustrated, and gave up. But now I'm back. (Oh, and since we were supposed to choose between angst or schmoop, guess which one I chose. Go on, guess.) And yes, the title is from "Behind Blue Eyes" by The Who, which was featured in 10.18.

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